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I'd like to introduce you to your new best friend!  If you are like most women, you have a deep desire to be loved and valued; you have a need for companionship, for a friend who is right there when you need him/her, one who understands what makes you tick and who listens when you need to talk.  Single women search for it in Mr. Right.  Married women look for it in their husbands.  We all look for it in our friends.  Welcome to the club -- it's universal!

The problem is that the elusive Mr. Right or hubby or our dearest friend never quite manages to fill that need.  If your marriage is like most, after the honeymoon is over (whether it's a week or five years) you're suddenly not the center of his universe anymore.  His mind is filled with projects at work and his limited time at home is spent working in the yard, on the car, on his hobbies, doing volunteer work for the church, teaching soccer for the kids, catching up on e-mail, surfing the internet, and watching TV.  It can seem like, unless they're in the mood for physical intimacy, we barely make a blip on their radar! Actually, that's an exaggeration, but it sure feels that way! And our friends have their own lives and families that demand their time and attention. 

But there we are, with that hole in our hearts and a need unmet.  It's easy to become first irritated by, then eventually consumed with, feelings of hurt, anger, jealousy, bitterness or fear that those we depend on don't love us.  The good news is that, if this describes you, you're in good company.  You're not weird!  Most women have felt this way, to some degree or another, at some point in their life.  Some women have lived for many years with this as a way of life.

The even better news is that it doesn't have to be this way!!  The truth is that God created each one of us with this need for a heart-friend.  Since He created us this way, He has a way of meeting that need.  He has provided a true friend who is far better than any human friend can ever be.

Now, before you roll your eyes and think, "Yeah, yeah, I've heard THAT before!!" bear with me for a little bit.  The reason that we don't perceive God as being able to really meet that need is because we don't know Him well enough.  Have you ever met someone who later became a close friend?   When you first met her/him you probably had no idea that person was "friend" material.  How did you move from acquaintance to friend?  Progressing from acquaintance to friendship involves several components. 

To move from acquaintance to friendship, first you spend some time together.  This might be time that goes along with other activities such as women's functions at church or time in the park while the kids are playing.  As a relationship grows, this incidental time moves to deliberate time.   You begin to plan time to be together -- for lunch, to go shopping, to do a project together -- so you can get to know each other better.

A second element in moving from acquaintance to friendship is sharing common interests.  Common interests are usually what move you from incidental time to deliberate time together.   You may find you both love horses, you have similar parenting styles and children the same age, you have past experiences in common such as being an only child, health issues, or childhood traumas.

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