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Someone recently asked me about the use of sarcasm.  This is another common speech problem.  Now, I have to be the first to admit that this is an area that particularly applies to me.  Sarcasm was used commonly as a mechanism of humor in my family when I was growing up, but it generally had a cutting edge on the back side.  While it was presented and used as a humorous tool, the truth of the heart is that it was simultaneously used as to produce shame in order to motivate behavioral change.  God doesn't attach shame to His discipline of His children.  Use of sarcasm as a disciplinary tool is also manipulative.  Sarcasm isn't speaking the truth in love.  Use of sarcasm is attempting to change someone's behavior by shaming or humiliating them.  It is also a habit that's hard to break and my oldest son has learned well from me! 

At the same time I love ironic humor. So what is the difference between ironic humor and sarcasm, or is there a difference?  Well, it comes down to what the motivation of the heart is.  And sometimes it truly is the secret motivation of the heart.  That secret motivation can be a secret even from the one who speaks it!

What is the example of Scripture about this specific question regarding the use of sarcasm?  There is a place where Paul appears to use sarcasm (II Cor. 11 -- it's hard to see it around the King James English but it's there).  Actually Paul speaks this way on more than one occasion.  One thing to note in II Cor. 11 is that Paul specifically prefaced his comments by clearly stating he was going to speak foolishly.   And I would propose that this isn't sarcasm, it is irony.  Paul was exposing the truth through the use of irony.

There's a fine, but definitive, line between sarcasm and irony. Sarcasm is defined in the American Heritage Dictionary as "a sharply mocking or contemptuous remark, typically utilizing statements or implications pointedly opposite or irrelevant to the underlying purport."  Irony is defined as "the use of words to convey the opposite of their literal meaning; an expression or utterance marked by such a deliberate contrast between apparent and intended meaning; a literary style employing such contrasts for humorous or rhetorical effect." Paul used irony in II Cor. 11 for rhetorical effect. 

The fundamental difference between sarcasm and irony is that sarcasm is intended (consciously or unconsciously) to mock, hurt or imply contempt. Just because it is also funny doesn't remove the sting of the underlying intention.  Irony is without demeaning intentions.  While sarcasm uses irony, irony isn't inherently sarcastic. 

My challenge to us all would be to ask the Holy Spirit to be our "dress checker" -- to reveal to us our slips of the tongue that show the truth of our heart.  Until it is exposed we cannot confess it to God and turn from the destructive hidden sin in our hearts.  This is a good thing, not a humiliating one!  If we have someone close enough to us that it is safe to be vulnerable, we can even be accountable to each other.  For instance, within our accountability group we have permission (built on years of trust) to catch each other's slips (keeping in mind Gal. 6:1).  Often, we don't hear these slips ourselves, but they may be glaringly obvious to someone else.  This has led to some wonderful times of confession and repentance within our group.  Many times we learn from each other's slips and realize we have the same secret heart sin hidden within ourselves.  So this is something that blesses each of us within the group.

Let's keep an eye on the mirror -- the words of our tongues reflecting the truth of our hearts -- for exposed slips!

* Accountability group as I use the term describes a mutual mentoring relationship for the specific purpose of fulfilling Heb. 3:12-13, 10:23-25. My accountability group is a group of friends who have banded together to seek God together weekly for his specific insight and direction in our lives and to pray with and for each other.

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