Love is the greatest gift I can give my children. It’s a gift that can transcend my human limitations and failings; my imperfect understanding and my flawed theology. It is a gift that will last forever.

I Corinthians chapter 13:

1. "Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal."
   No matter how eloquently I may speak in church, my children will hear my voice as so much noise and will roll their eyes if my actions toward them at home are not loving.
   
   
2. "And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing."
   It doesn’t matter how much of a "great" Christian I am in the church or in my community. It doesn’t matter if I’m a great speaker, a gifted teacher, or have a beautiful singing voice. If I don’t interact with my family in love, I am nothing.
   
   
3. "And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing."
   It doesn’t matter if I can plan terrific functions, whether I serve on several community boards and lead a variety of service projects. It doesn’t matter if I feed the homeless on Thanksgiving Day. If I do not have love for my family members, all my service and good works are of no value to me. God won’t give me any gold stars!
   
   
4. "Charity suffereth long,"
   Love often suffers at the hands of those it serves. It suffers injustice, misunderstanding, long hours of labor, aching muscles and throbbing temples. But it doesn’t begrudge the hurt. It just keeps on loving.

   "and is kind;"
   Love doesn’t speak through clenched teeth. Love doesn’t accept "stuffed" anger or irritation as if they are excusable when they’re not vented. Love chooses kindness in the face of fatigue and repeated disobedience. Love doesn’t speak unkind words in the name of "discipline."

   "charity envieth not;"
   Love doesn’t look at the fun the rest of the family is having and resent their enjoyment while I finish up the dishes after cooking dinner and cleaning house all day. Love doesn’t look at other families and think, "if only my family were like that!"

   "charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,"
   Love keeps it’s eyes on the truth that I am here to serve my family. Love remembers that I don’t have a right to put my feet up or take a long soaking bath tonight. It would be a nice bonus but I am not entitled!

   Love also doesn’t tell my children, "Because I’m the parent!" when they ask "why." Love remembers that there’s a bigger reason for obedience than me and that it is more important that they learn to obey for the best reasons, not just the "good enough" reasons.

   Love remembers that I can only teach respect by being respectful and that my children are not "less" or "lower" than me.

5. "Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own,"
   Love is not self-focused. Love does not contrive to get my needs met first. Love doesn’t insist that my children’s behavior reflect well on me in public. The goal of their obedience is long-term maturity and love of God – not making me look good when they are 7 years old.

   "is not easily provoked,"

   Love is not angered or irritated by my children’s disobedience and immaturity. Part of being children is that they are still in training. What good coach becomes angry because the high school athlete he is training doesn’t perform like an olympian?

   "thinketh no evil;"
   Love doesn’t assume my children are at fault. Love doesn’t discipline first and ask questions later, even if the baby says "he did it" or the man down the block is sure my Johnny broke his window.

6. "Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth;"
   Love doesn’t compare misbehavior "war" stories over the swings with other parents at the play ground. My children may overhear and be hurt. Even if they don’t ever hear, my scornful and unloving attitude will communicate itself to them. Instead, I focus on the truth of my children’s strengths, their God-given talents, the vision God has given me for their maturity and future, and how I can best help them develop these.
   
   
7. "Beareth all things,"
   Love remains constant even after ten nights in a row with almost no sleep, having my favorite shoes decorated with vomit, losing my great-grandmother’s heirloom to a ball that wasn’t supposed to be kicked in the house and seeing that the living room floor is once again covered with legos and mashed bananas.

   "believeth all things,"

   Love keeps its eyes on the truth of the Word, knowing that it never fails me and can be absolutely trusted.

   "hopeth all things,"
   Love remains focused on what God has promised to me for my children, even when their behavior seems to belie the possibility.

   "endureth all things."

   Sometimes my children can be downright cruel to me with cutting words and hurtful declarations. Even then, love keeps loving with patience that doesn’t end.

8. "Charity never faileth: but whether there be prophecies, they shall fail; whether there be tongues, they shall cease; whether there be knowledge, it shall vanish away." All the things I could ever say or do for the church will pass. My time on earth will come and go. But the lives I build in the privacy of my own home, and the lives they build in their turn following the model I made, will live forever.
   
   
9. "For we know in part, and we prophesy in part."
   
   
10. "But when that which is perfect is come, then that which is in part shall be done away."
    
    
11. "When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.
    
    
12. For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.
    
    
13. And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity."

This page has been displayed 1 times this month, 646 times since January 2, 2005 .