Denise's Testimony

I know you’ve stopped by for a cup of coffee, so let me tell you a little bit about myself, so we can get to know each other a little better.

Before I start, I would like to tell you that I seek no glory for myself, but I give all honor and glory to God my heavenly Father. It is only through His abundant grace and the fact that His mercies are new every morning, that I am able to write this to you. Lam. 3:22-23 "It is of the Lord’s mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness". My life is a testimony to God’s faithfulness to me.

My name is Denise Lower. My husband’s name is Scott and we have three children. Emily, 23, Evan, 21, and Caleb, 6. No, it is not a typo, I often refer to Caleb as the child of our old age. We also have a precious three year old granddaughter named Skylar, Emily’s daughter. As you can imagine, there is quite a journey here in my life, much like the one you are on, only with different names, faces and circumstances. I will share this journey with you little bit by little bit, much the way you would get to know a friend face to face.

We currently live in the Northwest Indiana area. Gary to be exact, 23 miles from Chicago, 8 miles from Lake Michigan and many many miles from all of you.

I was raised in a fundamental church. We began attending when I was eight years old. My mother took us to church by herself even though it was my father who initiated a Bible study with someone from work. Mom took what she heard into her heart, while Daddy rejected the truth he heard. It was difficult attending church during these growing up years, as we received much ridicule for our efforts of faithfulness.

I was saved and baptized at the age of fourteen. A traveling evangelist preached about Hell. I realized that night, that I was a sinner and did NOT want to go to Hell. I was scared. My best friend at the time was a Baptist, and had shared with me many times her beliefs about salvation. They were not the same ones taught at the church we attended, yet something my friend kept saying rang true. Christ’s blood covers all our sins, and there is no one who can take that away from us. John 10:29 "My Father, which gave them me, is greater than all: and no man is able to pluck them out of my Father’s hand". I walked the aisle in church that night and accepted Christ’s precious blood as atonement for my sins FOREVER, even though that church taught I could lose my salvation, and that baptism was what saved me. Praise the Lord for the friend’s God places in our lives. In my early thirties, I prayed for the assurance of my salvation, due to some unresolved sin in my life, and have since re-dedicated my life to God.

Even though the church I grew up in erred on some doctrinal issues, I believe I was taught something VERY basic. God’s word has the answer. Almost every Sunday and Wednesday evening, we did a verse by verse Bible study. I can look back on those seemingly boring evenings and know without a doubt that God’s word was being hid in my heart. Psalm 119:11 "Thy word have I hid in my heart, that I might not sin against thee." I was also taught by my mother to "Follow the book (Bible), not the man (preacher)". I believe these teachings have given me a foundation that is strong and secure. After all, God’s word itself teaches us in Luke 6:48, "He is like a man which built a house, and digged deep and laid the foundation on a rock: and when the flood arose, the stream bear vehemently upon that house, and could not shake it, for it was founded upon a rock".

You may need to get up and grab a second cup of java, we always have the pot on here for our Titus 2 Women. I am about to go into more detail about why I am here, how I got here and why I am so burdened for Christian Women today.

I am afraid if I went into great detail about my first marriage and several years thereafter, I would only be giving glory to sin and the devil, Eph 4:27 "Neither give place to the devil", so I will not dwell on that period of my life, unless necessary. With all I am, and all I ever hope to be, I want to glorify God and tell others of his mercy, grace, love and longsuffering.

I was married to a young man who grew up around the corner from me. He and some of his brothers were our paperboys over the years and his mother and my mother were "homeroom mothers" at school. After the normal and abnormal ups and downs of courtship, we were married the fall following my husband’s graduation from high school. I was a year older. I got pregnant for Emily the following summer, and she was born in March the following year. If you can do math, you can figure out that I was a fairly young bride, by the "standard" back then, and a very young mother.

My husband was working in one of the large factories in the same neighborhood in which we grew up. We moved across town to a "cheaper" place, then, the following Spring, I discovered I was pregnant for Evan. He was born just before Thanksgiving that year, and I thought life was perfect with the perfect family and the perfect husband who had the perfect job.

The next several years went from bad to worse, several moves in the same town, 4 miscarriages, my husband’s job loss and finally a move across the country to start "fresh".

This was the beginning of a very difficult time in my life. Our marriage failed, after 3-4 years of attempting to "make it work". This left me as a single mother raising two children at the ages of 6 and 8, plus trying to make enough money to keep a roof over our heads, food on the table and a car in the driveway, with gas in it. After a year of trying it on my own, my father convinced me to move "back home", go to school, and try to get a career.

I have always wanted to become an attorney, so I enrolled in the PreLaw classes. This lasted for 3 semesters, when I finally realized you really never can go "back home" again, especially with two pre-adolescent children. This prompted my move 3 hours North, to the town of my childhood friend. I called her one day and said, jokingly, "Ok, I need a place to live, a job, a school for my kids and a husband". This is my Baptist friend who not only MADE me go to church with her (you live on my property, you go to my church), made me join the choir ( you go to my church, you sing in my choir)...we had sung together all through high school, but had also introduced me to a man several months earlier, who is now my husband.

While living in this small, rural town, I became the consummate career woman. I worked in the legal field, then for the local government when the legal job could not be full time. I attended my friend’s Baptist church, which I NEVER thought I would do, but found myself actually enjoying the worship, enjoying the fellowship and enjoying the feeling of belonging. I began dating Scott in January following the Fall we moved there, after many months of just talking at my friends home and we were married in May.

This was the beginning of the journey that has led me here. Everything you have ever read about second marriages, seemed to come to fruition in this one. Three days after our wedding day, while still on our honeymoon, I realized this man was NOT the same man I had fallen in love with. After 11 separations and one legal divorce, I knew I needed to find an anchor for my life. When I was about 5 months pregnant for Caleb, I knew I could not do this by myself anymore, so I drove the 30 some miles to the nearest town with a Christian bookstore, stood in front of a rack of devotionals and bought one that sounded promising. In the middle of that little booklet, was a study about the life of Elijah. It was the turning point of my life. I knew I was not the Christian that God wanted me to be, or the wife Scott needed me to be, or the mother my two children and my unborn child needed me to be. Trembling with fear over the results of my life, I sank to my knees and gave everything over to God. My life, our marriage, my children, our unborn child. God answered my prayer for peace. I was a new creature, with a new will to live. II Cor 5:17 "Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature, old things are passed away, behold, all things are become new".

After complications NOT due to my age, Caleb was born almost 6 weeks early. 5 weeks after that I ran again to my sister’s in Texas. After a separation that lasted 6 months, Scott and I sat in a Big Boy restaurant in Paw Paw Michigan and decided to get back together "for the last time" and try another church. We have not been apart since. It was through nothing we did as fleshly people, but only God’s tender care for us, and a determination between us in front of a loving God, that has made our marriage so for the past 5 1/2years. Many MANY hours have been spent on our knees, seeking God’s face for success in our marriage, where before we only sought our own thoughts and ideas. Col. 1:21 "And you, that were sometime alienated and enemies in your mind by wicked works, yet now hath he reconciled". I know from experience that the ONLY way to have a marriage...... is God’s way.

We moved to this great NW Indiana area 9 months after joining this other church, to attend the Missions Program at a Bible college. That was 4 1/2 years ago. We are no longer college students, but lay people at a small but growing church in the area. We have always been active members in any church we have attended. My husband drives church busses and usually serves as an usher, and I have always served in the Music ministry, in the choir ,and ministering in special music. I have a love for Missions, and love to communicate with friends on the field. I have just recently come through another "turning point" in my life.....one that has taught me much about God’s love and grace, and that experience has prompted me to share my "journey" with other women. I have attempted to share some of my story more in depth in the links in this testimony, and will continue to add article after article as God gives the grace.

I DO have a "leisure life" (somewhat)....I LOVE to cross-stitch, sew, quilt, crochet and knit, time permitting of course. I also LOVE the written word, and love to write to honor God. I have tried my hand at poetry, but recently God has led me to write children's character building stories. With a little one in my life again, I have had to learn all over again how to structure my time. We currently are homeschooling Caleb. He is finishing up Kindergarten. Together with a group of 3 friends, I was instrumental in establishing a not for profit organization here in the NW Indiana area. This organization is currently an emergency based assistance program for the working poor, with plans to expand to speaking tours in the future. I am currently a "silent" member of this group, due to the demands of my home life. We all know how quickly these little ones grow up, and I count my time at home with this precious soul God has entrusted to me as a vital part in my service to God.

Thank you for stopping in and peeking into my life. If you read the links in the order given, it spells out a life marred in the Potter’s hand, Jer. 18:4. "But He made another life, as it seemed good for Him to do." My prayer is that something in it will help you. I contend that God has given me this life and these experiences for a reason.....and I believe that reason is found in the verses in II Cor. 1:3-5, "Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God of all comfort, 4. Who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God. 5. For as the sufferings of Christ abound in us, so our consolation and salvation."

There will be times in the course of writing these articles, where I will refer to my past marriage, and my current marriage. My husband and I have discussed this issue and have prayed about it, and Scott believes as strongly as I do that God has allowed these circumstances in our lives for a very important reason. We seek only to glorify God and to give this marriage back to the One who deserves all the credit, for He truly is the God of MANY chances. I WILL NOT glorify sin in any of my articles, nor will there be any graphic details of situations we have come through. Our prayer is ONLY that you receive a degree of help by reading our experiences. We trust as you read about how we worked through the problems of our life, that you will only see a God, full of Grace and Mercy, who loves us with an everlasting love.

Titus 2 Men And Women