The Lord has used this chapter of Scripture to minister to my heart many, many
times as I felt what Job felt and spoke. Job complained as he looked for God
but could not find Him in his trial or in his fatigue and pain. Yet, Job KNEW
God was in control even if he did not feel like He was anywhere to be found.
As I have read and re-read these verses I have been reminded that Job lived
a truth that our former pastor imbedded in to the hearts of his people: "Base
faith on facts NOT feelings."With these reminders came a lesson in open
honesty.
The Lord taught me, and a dear friend (Mrs. Marlene Evans) showed me in her
article on the feelings she went through with chemotherapy, that it is time---past
time---to be open and honest with others about our struggles. Right now I feel
exactly what she stated in her article for I too feel that I may be misunderstood.
But I believe that the Lord taught me and nudged me along to be honest and as
I have done so I have seen others feel understood. I have seen my "confessions"
of not always being above my humanity bring an end to others berating themselves
for their "feelings". While I cannot speak for others, I do know that nothing
keeps me from prayer longer than my kicking myself for being less than what
I feel I should be in Christ. Berating myself keeps me from the throne of grace
while understanding myself and my humanity drives me there.
So to be honest, in the last thirty-seven years I have experienced the fact
that great trials and illness can dig a pit of despair---even doubt---about everything
I "FEEL" as a Christian to be true. However, I have also learned that
I don’t have to "FEEL" anything because God has given me His infallible
"fact" book---His Word. Like Job I don’t have to "feel" anything is true because
I know what God said and God cannot lie.
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