Titus 2 Men And Women

Mom Sense Introduction
by Sharon Merhalski

For years I have had young---and not so young-- mothers ask me when I was ever going to write advice for raising children.  Lately God has been asking me the same question...and I know it is because of the titus2 burden of my heart...God commands us to teach the younger women.  Although I have a platform to do this now a.k.a. this web site, I also understand  that unsolicited advice is seldom taken. 

I told God in the wee hours of this morning that I would start this project today...and I prayed about this until dawn.  When I tried to put it off until tomorrow He seemingly poked me in the ribs.  So, I am starting right now.

Please know that any "Mom Sense" you will find in the following pages is not always some revolutionary idea of mine.  The LORD has provided many, many titus2 women in my life to teach me how to be a wife, mother, and Christian.  I was not raised in a Christian home....for the most part it was a brawling match.  So what I have learned I have learned from God’s Words,  godly women and the Holy Spirit as I have sought Him while raising my son and my daughter.

I have asked a few people who knew my children growing up to write something about my children.  Whenever I considered advice from anyone I made sure I could see good results in their own children.  I want no less for you as you read "Mom Sense".

Editors Note:

This is an excerpt from a letter received by the Titus 2 staff from a lifelong friend of Sharon’s.  It makes reference to the child rearing and parenting techniques used.  As they say, "the proof is in the pudding".................

I remember Kristina and Joe as grade schoolers and young teenagers. It is hard for me to remember specifics but I am pretty good at remembering the essence of things. In essence, I remember that I wanted my own children to grow up to be just like them because they talked easily to adults, they were respectful, they were well-mannered, they had fun but they didn't pull pranks, they loved being at church and involved in the various activities there.

They were good students and valued education. I never heard them sass you even though you had a friendly, kidding type of relationship with them. They enjoyed being around their parents. Kris especially enjoyed the younger kids and she was a great one for playing with my daughter Rachael. Joe was so gifted but he was so humble about it. Remember the duet that he wrote? He didn't need his part written out but he wrote out a part for me to play--that took patience from him cuz he could just play without notes. That is one of my fondest memories of him-- our playing that piano duet together.

I don't ever remember you having a holier than thou attitude about your kids even though they really were such good kids. Some people just brag up their kids so much that it really is rather sickening especially when people know that the kids are into stuff they shouldn't be--you weren't like that. You were realistic about them and would tell me the whens, whys and hows of disciplining them.

I used to ask you lots of questions about raising kids and one comment that has definitely stood the test of time from you is this: "whatever you tolerate in moderation as a parent, your children will do to excess." Now perhaps that was not a "Sharon Merhalski original" but it did exemplify your philosophy of childrearing from my perspective and I saw the fruits of it in your children from a positive point of view. 

 You also told me that teenagers sometimes had to be treated like 2 year olds because sometimes they couldn't be reasoned with and only "no because I said so" would do. You said that kids needed and wanted boundaries. It was a parent's responsibility to set them for the security of the children. Contrary to popular belief at the time, your children did not rebel because they had boundaries. Instead they seemed to thrive within the security of the boundaries.

Your own life was a great example to your children. You were always loyal to the pastor and church to which you belonged, a faithful attender, faithful in personal integrity and devotion to the Lord. Your children saw this and I think it was reflected in the development of their priorities.

I never saw you be harsh with your kids but you were firm in your expectations of them. You also said that their attitudes mattered as well as their obedience. You spent lots of time with your children. I don't remember you and Pete taking off for weekends away leaving the kids home alone. I think you did most things together as a family. Even though your family went through some incredibly tough things, you always stayed faithful to the Lord and sought His help, healing, and guidance in every situation from severe illness and financial difficulties to heartbreaking church problems. That says alot to kids growing up. You were very open with your children and during those hard times, (they seemed to be the norm for you guys) you didn't try to paint some rosy false picture for them.

 You didn't threaten your children with "wait til your father gets home." You handled things as they arose and instead of being mom the "softy," you had children who respected and honored you.

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