Bullying...A Real Problem

Bullies can take the fun out of school - where bullying happens most - and turn something simple like a ride on the bus, stop at a locker, or walk to the bathroom into a scary event that's anticipated with worry all day.

Children who are bullied often experience low self-esteem and depression, whereas those doing the bullying may go on to engage in more destructive, antisocial behaviors as teens and adults. Bullies, who often have been bullied themselves, may pick on others to feel powerful, popular, important, or in control. Often, they antagonize the same children repeatedly. 

Sadly, bullying is widespread. According to a 2004 KidsHealth KidsPoll, 86% of more than 1,200 9- to 13-year-old boys and girls polled said they've seen someone else being bullied, 48% said they've been bullied, and 42% admitted to bullying other kids at least once in a while.

Tips For Parents:
If your child is a victim of bullying, you can help reduce intimidation and fear by taking these actions:

1. Spend quality time with your child.
2. Teach your child not to be a bystander.
3. Ask your children thoughtful questions:
4. What's it like walking to the bus stop or home?
5. What happens on the playground during recess before or after school? 
6. What happens in the hallways at school or during lunchtime? 
7. Have any bullies in the neighborhood or at school threatened anyone you know? 

If you learn your child is being bullied do the following:

1. Stay calm and tell your child that they don't deserve to be bullied.
2. Ask why they think they are being bullied.
3. Think of a peaceful solution together.

Although the black eye is a concrete sign that your child may be a victim of bullying, there are many different ways kids bully that aren't always as easy to spot:

1. Cyber bullying - a relatively new phenomenon - began surfacing as modern communication technologies advanced. Through email, instant messaging, Internet chat rooms, and electronic gadgets like camera cell phones, cyber bullies forward and spread hurtful images and/or messages. Bullies use this technology to harass victims at all hours, in wide circles, at warp speed. 
2. Emotional bullying can be more subtle and can involve isolating or excluding a child from activities (i.e., shunning the victim in the lunchroom or on school outings) or spreading rumors. This kind of bullying is especially common among girls. 
3. Physical bullying can accompany verbal bullying and involves things like kicking, hitting, biting, pinching, hair pulling, or threats of physical harm. 
4. Racist bullying preys on children through racial slurs, offensive gestures, or making jokes about a child's cultural traditions. 
5. Sexual bullying involves unwanted physical contact or sexually abusive or inappropriate comments. 
6. Verbal bullying usually involves name-calling, incessant mocking, and laughing at a child's expense.

Tips For Kids:
--Calmly confront the bully. Say Things like "Leave me alone." It's not funny." "It's not cool to hurt others."
--Tell a teacher or parent exactly what is going on.
--Try getting a group of friends to go with you to confront the bully.
--If you see someone being bullied, stand up for them.
--Change the situation. 
--Keep away.
--Ignore them. 
--Walk away.
--Stand up as a group. 
--Ask for help.
--Be confident and kind. 
--Show you are strong.
--Use a strong voice. 
--Look confident.

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