Protecting Your Child From Incest

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Protecting Your Child From Incest

"I always thought that as a Christian your husband is first and the most important person in your life no matter what kind of person he is." I was confronted with this statement in an abuse situation recently...it really challenged my thinking. I have prayed and thought about this teaching for weeks. I then had to write what I believe and why I believe it to see if my thought aligned with the Bible.

1. I believe that an individual’s first responsibility is their personal relationship with God.
   
   
2. I believe that an individual’s second responsibility is their one flesh relationship with their mate.
   
   
3. Then their relationship with their children & family.
   
   
4. I also believe that when a father is sexually abusing his child, the mother must take the child/children and remove them from harm. Now these beliefs don’t seem to be able to co-exist.

Where our understanding breaks down is when we think that putting our spouse first is correct, when putting God first is correct. If our spouse demands that we do or consent to what God has clearly declared wrong, GOD COMES FIRST. To put your husband first in this situation is idolatry -- putting the husband BEFORE God.

I have always been taught that adultery was sexual intercourse with other than your spouse, and that fornication was pre-marital intercourse. (Consent implied in both cases.) However, it clearly states that the thought is the same as the deed in Matthew 5:27-28 "Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery:

But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart." So the inappropriate looking and touching is in God’s sight the act completed, actual intercourse isn’t necessary for fornication or adultery.

The other evening my husband was talking and meant to say adultery but said incest. I think I actually jumped when he spoke because as I heard him, I heard the Holy Spirit whisper...that’s it. I have studied using Strong’s Exhaustive Concordance to look up the Hebrew and Greek words.

Fornication: The Greek word porneia: harlotry, adultery, incest, (figuratively idolatry)

The Greek word porneue: to act, practice, indulge in harlotry, adultery, or incest. (figuratively To practice idolatry)

Adultery: The Greek words moichao and moicheuo: to commit adultery (Break ones marriage vows)

Accept that leaving is needed in the case of danger.

Matthew 5:32 "But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery."

Matthew 19:9 "And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery."

Using the complete meanings of the Greek word for fornication the reason for a spouse to leave and put the other away is adultery, prostitution, or incest. In order to protect the child from future abuse and to help the child find healing in Christ, the child must be removed from the access of the abuser. Christ was very specific in the need to not abuse or offend a child.

These verses indicate that the one person can "cause" another to commit adultery -- non-concentually, such as occurs in any situation of sexual abuse. No matter how "mild" or "severe," sexual contact creates a "one-flesh" bond. This is a profound fundamental violation of another, causing them permanent damage in this deepest part of themselves. God DOES NOT condone this. If God expected a woman to remain with a spouse who did this to her children, it would violate His own word because it would be requiring that she condone (and thereby He condone) this sin.

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