Titus 2 Men And Women

What Is Child Abuse?

Because of my childhood-and our daughter's injustice, God has trusted me to counsel many women, and several teen-age boys, who have all experienced some form of abuse. Some of these counselees were parents whose children had been abused…which ultimately resulted in the abuse of the parents also. So often I have heard some form of the words, "oh, it wasn't much to be concerned about."

Recovering from my childhood without the blessing of a counselor eventually sent me to the library-- often. The first year I spent healing with God and His Word alone. For the next two years I did a vast amount of reading and writing. I probably could write a volume for this section but I am going to let others teach what child abuse is.

For some that read this text-- the following definitions will be more comprehensive than they ever imagined. Some may even consider the definitions to be "blown out of proportion". I am also aware that some may read this and begin to understand themselves in a frightening way. Whatever your reaction, I so encourage you to read all of the material provided in every section before you let your reactions cause you to stop.
~~Sharon Merhalski

Child abuse includes assaults in any of several domains (physical, sexual, or emotional) and may be acts of commission (abuse) or omission (neglect). Congress broadly defines child abuse in Public Law 93-247 as the "physical or mental injury, (word omitted) abuse, negligent treatment, or maltreatment of a child under the age of eighteen by a person who is responsible for the child's welfare under circumstances which indicate that the child's health or welfare is threatened thereby." Many researchers and clinicians view child abuse as a broad collection and range of acts. ---Author/s: Doreen Arcus, Ph.D. University of Massachusetts Lowell

Government Definition of Abuse as written in the law:

"Abuse" means any willful act that results in any physical, mental, or (word omitted) injury that causes or is likely to cause the child's physical, mental, or emotional health to be significantly impaired. Corporal discipline of a child by a parent or guardian for discipline purposes does not in itself constitute abuse when it does not result in harm to the child (s. 415.503).

Child abuse kills more children in America than do accidental falls, drowning, choking on food, fires in the home, or suffocation.
--U.S. Dept. of Justice

STATISTICS

· 1 in 4 girls and at least 1 in 10 boys are sexually abused in some way by the time they reach adolescence 10% of those children are preschoolers (Children's Hospital, D.C.)
· 85-90% involve perpetrators known to the child (Groth, 1982; DeFrancis, 1969; Russell, 1983)
· 35% involve a family member (King County Rape Relief, Washington)
· Only 10% of the offenses involve physical violence (Jaffee, 1975)
· 50% of all assaults take place in the home of the child or the offender (Sanford, 1980)
· The average offender is involved with over 70 children in his or her "career" of offending (Sanford, 1980, Abel and Becker, 1980

What Are The Types of Child Abuse and Neglect?

Definitions of abuse include physical abuse, sexual abuse and neglect (known also as emotional abuse.)
Harm to children can result from:
· Physical injury, such as beatings, burns and bites.
· Constant criticism, insults, the withholding of love.
· Rape, (improper touching), incest.
· The failure to provide food, clothing, shelter, or medical care.
By Prevent Child Abuse America

CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE

Because this web site is geared to the Christian community and many homes have filters on their computers that would prevent them from access to the web site if certain words were used, we are unable to post the comprehensive definitions of (word omitted) abuse. If you would like comprehensive definitions of (word omitted) abuse please e-mail SharonM@titus2menandwomen.org and we will be glad to forward the definitions to you by e-mail as printed in Dr. David B. Allender's book
'The Wounded Heart'. Also, we replaced certain words with "(word omitted)" to keep the information informative, but not offensive.

WHY DO WE NEED TO KNOW ABOUT SEXUAL ABUSE?

We need to know about (word omitted) abuse because (word omitted) abuse of children is all around us in our homes and communities. The most quoted statistic is that five hundred thousand children are (word omitted) abused each year The unfortunate problem is that parents and I believe especially Christian parents choose to believe that it only happens to someone else. -Sharon

WHAT IS SEXUAL ABUSE?

Quoted from 'The Wounded Heart'
by Dr. Dan B. Allender

"What is (word omitted) abuse? It seems that many people operate on the principle that whatever happened to them is not abuse, but if it had happened to someone else or if it had been a bit more extreme, then it would have been abusive... Because of this kind of confusion about what constitutes (word omitted) abuse, it is imperative to have a clear definition:
***(word omitted) abuse is any contact or interaction (visual, verbal, or psychological)
between a child/adolescent and an adult when the child/adolescent is being
used for the (word deleted) stimulation of the perpetrator or any other person. "

Charles F. Johnson defines child (word omitted) abuse as "any activity with a child, before the age of legal consent, that is for the (word deleted) gratification of an adult or a significantly older child."

The clinical definition of (word omitted) abuse has changed drastically over the past several years. As it increasingly expands our society has slowly begun to recognize the wide range of activities committed by (word omitted) offenders. (Word omitted) abuse can be physical, verbal or emotional. A one time episode of (this kind of abuse) may seem unimportant to some, but never the less given the fact that it has occurred at all still constitutes (word omitted) abuse and should be dealt with for the sake of the child. One time abused-- is one too many. Until we realize that the children of this world will continue to suffer at the hands of these abusers. -Children Are Worth Saving

Emotional abuse

Emotional abuse can happen in many settings: at home, at school, on sports teams, and so on. Some of the possible symptoms include loss of self-esteem, sleep disturbances, headaches or stomach aches, school avoidance, and running away from home.
Emotional abuse is a pattern of behavior that attacks a child's emotional development and sense of self-worth. Emotional abuse includes excessive, aggressive or unreasonable demands that place expectations on a child beyond his or her capacity. Constant criticizing, belittling, insulting, rejecting and teasing are some of the forms these verbal attacks can take. Emotional abuse also includes failure to provide the psychological nurturing necessary for a child's psychological growth and development -- providing no love, support or guidance (National Committee for the Prevention of Child Abuse, 1987).

All of the articles I have read combine emotional abuse and neglect in to one problem. - Sharon

Neglect

Many cases of neglect occur because the parent experiences strong negative feelings toward the child. At other times, the parent may truly care about the child, but lack the ability or strength to adequately provide for the child's needs because handicapped by depression, drug abuse, mental retardation, or some other problem.

Neglected children often do not receive adequate nourishment or emotional and mental stimulation. As a result, their physical, social, emotional, and mental development is hindered. They may, for instance, be underweight, develop language skills less quickly than other children, and seem emotionally needy
.
Neglect can be physical in nature (abandonment, failure to seek needed health care), educational (failure to see that a child is attending school), or emotional (abuse of a spouse or another child in the child's presence, allowing a child to witness adult substance abuse). Inappropriate punishment, verbal abuse, and scapegoating are also forms of emotional or psychological child abuse."-Broken Spirits Network

I have always felt that neglect is second only to (word omitted) abuse in causing much emotional damage. Some may be thinking, "more than physical abuse?" From personal experience I will answer, "yes!" I can remember begging my mother to just hit me! The pain from a slap or razor strap to whatever she could hit eventually went away. And emotional abuse-- her words did just as the Bible says words can do…"kill". Proverbs 18:21 Death and life are in the power of the tongue… My mother's words killed my emotions and my sense of any worth at all. However abuse by neglect is, I believe the most insidious form of abuse because it too often goes unnoticed. One only has to see a presentation about the orphans in Romania when Communism ruled the country. Those children, sorely neglected by grossly understaffed institutions, had emotional and psychological scars that just never could heal. When they became adults, more of them than not, they needed powerful psychological drugs just to abnormally exist.
After doing much reading on this subject I will now list the different forms of neglect:
CHILD NEGLECT is the care givers lack of providing for a child's basic needs of food, shelter, water, clothing, etc. Neglect of a child may be based on repeated conduct or on a single incident or omission that results in, or could reasonably be expected to result in, serious physical or mental injury, or a substantial risk of death to a child.

• Physical neglect…a refusal of, or delay in, seeking health care, abondonment, inadeuqate supervision.
• Educational neglect…allowing a child to be chronically truant or not enrolling a child in school by the mandatory age in your state.
• Emotional neglect…allowing a child to see and hear extreme spouse abuse
• Emotional abuse…can inculde screaming, yelling, belittling, name calling, emotional detachment, lack of love and affection, scapegoating-such as blaming a child for the problems of the adults. Emotional abuse, according to Richard D. Krugman, "has been defined as the rejection, ignoring, criticizing, isolation, or terrorizing of children, all of which have the effect of eroding their self-esteem."

--Sharon Merhalski

PHYSICAL ABUSE

Physical abuse is characterized by physical injury, usually inflicted as a result of a beating or inappropriately harsh discipline. -Broken Spirits Network

Physical abuse is the nonaccidental infliction of physical injury to a child. The abuser is usually a family member or other caretaker, and is more likely to be male. In 1996, 24% of the confirmed cases of U.S. child abuse involved physical abuse. -Gale Encyclopedia of Medicine

The usual physical abuse scenario involves a parent who loses control and lashes out at a child. The trigger may be normal child behavior such as crying or dirtying a diaper. Unlike nonabusive parents, who may become angry at or upset with their children from time to time but are genuinely loving, abusive parents tend to harbor deep-rooted negative feelings toward their children.
Unexplained or suspicious bruises or other marks on the skin are typical signs of physical abuse, as are burns. Skull and other bone fractures are often seen in young abused children, and in fact, head injuries are the leading cause of death from abuse. Children less than one year old are particularly vulnerable to injury from shaking. This is called shaken baby syndrome or shaken impact syndrome. Not surprisingly, physical abuse also causes a wide variety of behavioral changes in children. -Gale Encyclopedia of Medicine
A rare form of physical abuse is Munchausen syndrome by proxy, in which a caretaker (most often the mother) seeks attention by making the child sick or appear to be sick-Gale Encylopedia of Medicine.

RITUAL ABUSE

Adding this subject to this material only came after much thought and prayer on the matter. I realize that occult practices are not uttered in churches and rarely among Christians at all. However, I have counseled with several Christian families and individuals, and have done enough reading, to know that the problem is real, and more prevalent than any of us would choose-or should choose-- to even think about. --Sharon Merhalski

Another disturbing trend shows an increase in reports of ritual abuse, or satanic ritual abuse (SRA), in which.... children are systematically and repeatedly tortured...(in uspeakable ways). -Gale Encyclopedia of Psychology

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