Titus 2 Men And Women

Who Abuses Children?

WHO ARE ABUSERS?

Quoted from "The Wounded Heart"
By Dr. Dan Allender

"The abuser can by anyone. He can be your father, your pastor, your brother or your seventy-year-old next-door neighbor. Often a victim has had so many abusers that it seems as if he or she sent a serial letter inviting them to join in the debauchery of abuse. It is not unusual to see a client who has been abused by several family members, a neighbor, boyfriends, teacher, counselor, or employer.

The abuser may be a man or a woman. It is far more common for a young girl to be abused by an adolescent or adult male, but it is inaccurate to presume that men do not abuse boys or women do not abuse girls and boys.

The abuser may be decades older or the same age. He or she may have an honored role in your family or may not be known to you or anyone in your family. In any case, the perpetrator will have a face, a voice, and a smell. Even if you cannot recall any details about him, he will be like a faded picture you carry in your wallet. Though you may not have seen him in thirty years or you may have eaten lunch with him yesterday, he still plays a significant part in your daily life, and likely an even greater role in every dream or nightmare."

Jeremiah 17:9 The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?

Profile of a Pedophile

Quoted from childlures.org.

Pedophiles possess no tidy criminal profile. They come from all walks of life. Some are married, some single; some professional, some blue-collar; some young, some retired. Some prefer boys, and some prefer girls. Some are attracted to young children, others to older children. In short, pedophilia, or (word deleted) attraction to children by an adult, is a sickness that does not discriminate by race, class, or age. It knows no bounds, and afflicts people in every segment of society.

Most pedophiles do, however, share several characteristics. The overwhelming majority of pedophiles are male. Only a very small percentage of women abuse children (word omitted), and they are usually cooperating with a male aggressor.
Few pedophiles are able to resist their powerful urges to initiate (word deleted) contact with children. As a result, child molesters often make efforts to gain access to or authority over children. They take jobs where children are easily approached, or they actively pursue youngsters by befriending parents (particularly single parents), attending events for children, coaching children¹s sports, chaperoning camping trips, frequenting video arcades, or offering baby-sitting services to friends, family, and neighbors with children.
The majority of pedophiles prefer children on the brink of puberty and prey on a child's (word deleted) ignorance and curiosity…

Small groups of militant and highly organized child molesters operate worldwide through pedophile organizations, whose members claim genuine concern for the welfare of children. Their belief is that (this kind of contact) with children is harmless; some even claim… healthy for children. These groups' goals include decriminalizing child molestation and lowering the age of consent…

While the average child molester does not belong to a pedophile organization, we would be foolish not to take seriously any group whose members are committed to (word omitted) activity with children. Indeed, pedophiles are often difficult to detect and can be found in the most unlikely of places. Knowing this, we must provide our children with the tools to recognize and avoid potentially abusive individuals and situations.

I debated whether or not to add the following text. I thought about it at length as I sat and remembered our nightmare twenty years ago Twenty years is a long time…. But memories are indelible It would sound better if I could say that I never felt uneasy or troubled about my daughter's predator. While I would love to be able to say that I cannot do so. In hindsight, both then and now, I remember berating myself for having such thoughts of suspicion about my pastor. I remember trying to repent over how I thought I saw him look at her. I remember almost hating myself for my mother's intuition that I had accepted as Satan's lies.

My plea to you as parents is to listen to God's still small voice and trust the Holy Spirit's nudging as he directs you and leads you into all truth…in every situation in your life. Trust that 'gut instinct" …those "vibes" that ring in your heart. Trust those things-- letting them cause you to stop, take notice, watch, question and pray, and pray, and pray for wisdom of who to tell. -Sharon Merhalski

Matthew 5:8 Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God.

What To Watch Out For When Adults Are With Children

Quoted from Child Lures Prevention

Have you ever seen someone playing with a child and felt uncomfortable with it? Maybe you thought, "I'm just over-reacting," or, "He/she doesn't really mean that." Don't ignore the behavior; learn how to ask more questions about what you have seen. The checklist below offers some warning signs.

Do you know an adult or older child who:

• Refuses to let a child set any of his or her own limits?
• Insists on hugging, touching, kissing, tickling, wrestling with or holding a child even when the child does not want this affection?
• Is overly interested in the sexuality of a particular child or teen (e.g., talks repeatedly about the child's developing body or interferes with normal teen dating)?
• Manages to get time alone or insists on time alone with a child with no interruptions?
• Spends most of his/her spare time with children and has little interest in spending time with someone their own age?
• Regularly offers to baby sit many different children for free or takes children on overnight outings alone?
• Buys children expensive gifts or gives them money for no apparent reason?
• Frequently walks in on children/teens in the bathroom?
• Allows children or teens to consistently get away with inappropriate behaviors?

If you answered "yes" to some of these questions, talk to that person. If you are uncomfortable, but don't see these signs, be sure to trust your instincts and ask questions. -Stop It Now.

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