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Squirrels ................

I think squirrels are really cute and fun to watch. My husband thinks…well, let's just say he often wages war against the pesky little critters!

Squirrels are touted as being very smart. They can open latches on bird feeders and gates. I do wish they would be smart enough to learn to stay out of our bird feeders so that my husband could peacefully co-exist with them…before the neighbors call someone to take him away for psychiatric care. C:

Thankfully my husband does not have heart trouble or high blood pressure. I am thinking in particular of one Saturday when he had had enough! He got axle grease and greased the poles on our bird feeders. He quickly learned what the term "flying squirrel" meant. From three to four feet away they leaped to a feeder 5' off of the ground. Then my husband made an aluminum inverted cone and put it around one pole. Surely this would prevent them from climbing. He soon learned just how ingenious these, as he calls them, "furry rats" can be.

One squirrel seemed to be eyeing my husband in all of his futile ventures. So-the last straw-my husband got a wooden box, tied a string to a stick and used peanut butter for bate. He sat the trap and went around the corner of the house holding the string that would catch this pesky creature-surely an escapee from the fiery center of the earth! Thud! Aha! Trapped!

My husband went into the garage long enough to start his forge. He got a cage to transport this 'demon' out into the country (or so he told me). Ten minutes later he found the squirrel had chewed a hole in my antique wooden box and ran for his life! I was able to reason with my husband to stop for the day before the neighbors had him arrested for disturbing the peace. That day he could have pled temporary insanity. C:

I have heard every 'remedy' under the sun for keeping these creatures where they belong…out of our yards. The following is from Jerry Baker's book "Garden Secrets" and I have been told that this one really works. Following the recipe are 'squirrel quips' that I found on the Internet.

SQUIRREL BEATER TONIC

"To keep those pesky squirrels from chewing up everything in sight, douse your prized plantings with this spicy, sure-fire tonic:
· 2 tbs. Of cayenne pepper
· 2 tbs. Of Tobasco sauce
· 2 tbs. Of chili powder
· 1 tbs. Of Murphy's Oil Soap
· 1 quart of warm water
Mix all of the ingredients together. Pour into a handheld sprayer, and liberally spray all of your plants." --Jerry Baker

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BB Gun?

I am looking for the best advice on getting rid of squirrels. I've tried Tabasco, red pepper, and other smelly items to make the plants in my garden less attractive to them but none seem to work. They have systematically worked their way through my garden this spring and have dug up each and every plant I've planted, especially my bulbs! I would buy a BB gun but, apparently, it's illegal to kill them! I would settle for severely maiming them or at the very least knocking them just hard enough to make them run around in little circles the rest of their lives.

Seriously though, are there any home remedies that folks out there have tried that have worked in keeping them out of your yards?
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