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"Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves."
Philippians 2:3

"Mom," my oldest daughter began one evening as we were driving home from somewhere, "You really need to quit nagging Dad. I think it is starting to stress him out. The other night I asked him why he was being so grouchy and he said it is because he doesn't like it when you correct him in public or act like his mother. Now, I'm mostly on your side Mom, but Dad does have a point. No man likes for his wife to tell him what to do-even if he does do some pretty strange things sometimes."

"Yeah, I know what you mean," I answered contemplatively, "I remember how mad he got the other night when I tried to tell him that he shouldn't wear those big, huge, rubber boots to church. I was just trying to be helpful-after all, I didn't want everyone at church to think he was weird."

"Well Mom," my youngest piped in, "If you don't leave Dad alone and let him be weird, he'll just keep acting weirder, and weirder, and weirder, until he proves to the whole world that he can be weird without anyone correcting him for it. So, why don't you just accept him for the way he is, and let him be weird?"

That's a good question. Why don't I just accept my husband the way he is and let him be weird if he wants to be? Why do I think that I have to govern everything he does, comment on everything he says, or worry about everything that he is supposed to do? Why don't I just leave the poor guy alone and let him be himself?

Is it because of pride? Is it because I am worried about how I will look to others if he doesn't do what I think he should do?

Is it because of fear? Am I afraid that if I don't tell him what to do, or correct some of the things that he does, that he won't remember what he is supposed to do?

Is it because of self-centeredness? Do I nag him and control him because I think that my way is the only way of doing things?

Or is it because I am genuinely concerned for him? Do I criticize and judge him because I genuinely want to help him? Is it that I think that pointing out his every flaw and fault will lead him on the right road to self-improvement?

I have to be honest with you, I really don't know. I'm not sure why I pester him at times like I do. I know that sometimes it is because of pride. I have to admit, there are times when I am concerned about what people might think of me when my husband does some of the things that he wants to do. And I know that at times it is because of fear. Sometimes I am afraid that my husband won't do what he is supposed to do if I don't nag him about it. And I know that sometimes it is because of my self-centeredness-many times I do believe that my way is the best way.

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