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But this journey for abused people is a treacherous one. I ask you to bear with me and hear me out. As a fellow abuse victim, I know that this journey for me has felt like running over hot coals with glass-cut feet. I know it can be painful and must be walked through carefully.

Specifically, take one step at a time. In fact, I am writing this very slowly, a little at a time (like when I would go back and do paperwork in my dentist's waiting room while the Novocain slowly prepares me for my next layer of treatment).

So we should read this slowly -- it may be one page, one paragraph or even one sentence at a time. Life is a marathon, not a sprint -- if you really want quality. So it is with emotional pain. I recommend you try to set aside a safe place and time to read a small "dose" of this two to three times a week -- no faster. This is emotional "power building and bulk training!" You may be trying to move and deal with old, rusty 500 lb. size wounds that have sharp edges!

I recommend that you read very slowly and ask yourself some simple questions like:

"God, what are you saying to me in this?"
"How does this relate to me?".

Let your mind relax and write down whatever comes to the surface. This is very important. Get a pad or any piece of paper. Write today's date and the page number of this book you are on and write what comes to mind. I suggest putting a "/" at the sentence in this book for reference purposes.

Maybe you have already given up or feel blocked, maybe a little hopeless. May I suggest some additional support to you at this point? I suggest you find a "4S" -- a "Same Sex Spiritual Support Person." The Word says,
"Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend." (Prov. 27:17) We all need support. Don't cut yourself off from support. If you don't have a man you can talk to, pray about who can be your "Barnabas" (Acts 4:6, 9:26-28).

Let me also suggest another source of support that you should not quickly dismiss. If you struggle with stress, or hopelessness, or are stuck emotionally, please consider seeing your family doctor and asking for a trial anti-depressant medication. Male depression is more common than presently prescribed and its symptoms are many times masked.

Keep your writing totally private. If you want to share some specific parts of it with others, that's up to you. But you need to be as "emotionally open" as possible and explore your feelings as deeply as possible. Subconsciously, complete freedom through private and safe writing is very valuable. Remember "deep calleth unto deep" -- and deep wounds have deep pains and need deep healing. In my writing, as I have true freedom to write anything that comes to mind, feelings seem to come to the surface for me to address.

I keep a separate, private log or journal no one else reads. It's amazing but true that writing is like "emotional dialysis." In fact, research shows that writing calls into play the use of multiple brain processes. When we do such combined writing and thinking we exponentially release and gain insights into deep emotions we may not have realized where there! So write it down (Habakuh 2:2) and keep it private. Hide it under your mattress, in your car seat, locked trunk, gun rack, wherever. But write it and hide it.

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