Titus 2 Men And Women

Praying Parent Lesson 9 Foundations for Godly Children

We've reached a point in this book where I find the chapters too difficult to use as lesson titles. They are good points...good thoughts, but not enough for a whole lesson. I'm going to teach a few more lessons from the book but I'm going to group some thoughts and principles in these last couple of lessons.

We become parents with pre-concieved ideas about how our child will act, grow, and learn. We usually, have determined what we will allow as acceptable behavior. Along the way we find that we were the brave untried when we made our plans.

Raising children is much easier if we are steadfast in areas where the Bible is specific and flexible in areas where the Bible is not specific. Let's look at God's basic inflexible rules; The Ten Commandments.

Exodus 20:3 "Thou shalt have no other gods before me."

Well, that is simple to understand and we should not have any problem with this one. Let's look at a couple of possible problem areas.

• Heros: When I grow up I"m going to be just like him.
• Posessions: Don't touch that, it's mine. That's my lucky ring

Exodus 20:4 "Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image, or any likeness of any thing that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth:"

This doesn't mean your child can't paint a picture, model clay or carve wood, the next verse explains "to worship it." If the artwork and knick-knacks are more important then God there is a problem.

Exodus 20:7 "Thou shalt not take the name of the LORD thy God in vain; for the LORD will not hold him guiltless that taketh his name in vain."

Now I always used to think that as long as I didn't sware I was OK on this one. Wrong, the word vain means empty. When we hear or use one if the names of God it should be Praise, Worship, Prayer, Instruction or to Rebuke sin but never as a word to add color to our speech or because we can't think of anything else to say.

Exodus 20:8 "Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy."

As a society we have really gotten away from this commandment. As New Testament believers we attend church on Sunday, the day of the resurrection instead of on Saturday. For how many of us has Sunday become the day we go home from church and finish the laundry? How many of our children have to hurry home after church Sunday night so they can do their homework? Are we able to spend all day Sunday worshiping the Lord and allowing our bodies to rest? Yep, I know I've gone to meddling. God will not strike me dead if I go home and clean the bathroom but my body would benefit from a nap.

Exodus 20:12 "Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee."

You must be the parent and demand respect for both yourself and your husband. If you allow your child to play one parent against the other the child loses respect for both of you. This means that you and your husband have to discuss the non-rigid areas and reach an agreement. No snacking between meals means Dad doesn't hand the kids a bag of chips when he comes home. No telephone until the homework is done means Mom doesn't hand Susie the phone because Jeanie needs the homework assignment.

Exodus 20:13 "Thou shalt not kill."

Ok, we found an easy one. Well, almost. We do need to carefully watch that we learn to control our anger, that anger is always directed at the sin and not the sinner.

Proverbs 23:7 "For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he:"

Exodus 20:14 "Thou shalt not commit adultery."

When our children are young this is so easy but as they grow it creeps steadily into their lives. Children today face sexual impurity on a daily basis. I know you want to say "not my child" but can any of you say that your family never hears a song about a cheating lover, never sees at least partial nudity on tv, has never met an un-wed mother, has never known a couple who lived together before marriage, has never watched the movie Titanic, and we aren't even talking about books, magazines or peer pressure.

Matthew 5:28 "But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart."

Exodus 20:15 "Thou shalt not steal."

Now this one really is simple. If it's not yours don't take it. If you find your child has taken something that isn't theirs then you must explain that it is wrong and take the child back to make it right.

Exodus 20:16 "Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbour." I have to tell you this is a very difficult area. Children will tell you most of the truth if it makes them look good. The more children you have the more difficult it becomes to get the truth, particularly when they are very close in age or very stubborn. Let me give you a couple of examples.

We had a can of Hersheys chocolate syrup disappear from our kitchen. We lined up all five of our sons and asked, "Who took the can of chocolate?" All five denied taking it. Fred then talked to the boys about the sin of lying and sent the boys to their rooms to think. A half-hour later Fred again asked, "Who took the can of chocolate?" The three-year-old confessed. The older boys were sent back to their rooms and we talked to the Russ. We knew that Russ hadn't taken the chocolate because he couldn't have opened the can. Russ then told us that the older brothers had told him to say he did it because he wouldn't get in as much trouble as one of them would. We then lined all five boys up in a row. Fred explained that since the real thief wouldn' t admit what he had done, that we had no choice but to punish everyone. That each boy would get two swats with a belt, and that every half hour they would each get two more swats until the truth was told. Praying that the culpret wouldn't let his baby brother get spanked for no reason, Fred announced that Russ would get the first two swats. The ploy worked and the guilty son admitted his theft and lie.

The second example concerns a couple I know. Whenever one of their daughters did something they shouldn't have done and their parents asked, "Susie, did you do this?" Susie looked them right in the eye and said, "No." The parents would then ask Becky if she had done it. Becky was a very tenderhearted child. She hated to see her parenets up-set about anything, she would start to cry and say "No." Because she was crying her parents assumed she was guilty and punished her. She was told not to do it again and not to lie. When the girls were teenagers. Susie got her heart right with the Lord. At that time she told her parents that as a child she had lied to them repeatedly and Becky had taken her spankings. She also apologised to Becky.

Exodus 20:17 "Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's house, thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his ass, nor any thing that is thy neighbour's."

This one is simply a matter of being openly and exceedingly grateful for what you have. If your children hear you saying, "I want", "I wish I had" or even "It's just what I've always wanted" they will learn to covet and be dissatisfied from you.

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